The piece, Catch Tango, was inspired by my muse, Amiee Boswinkle and her journey with the shadow "FEAR."
I'm breaking up with you.
I've thought about this long and hard, you're the one thing holding me back.
We've had such an intimate relationship my entire life, I've romanticized about you for much too long.
As with any relationship I've ever had, I'm sure I will come running back to you the moment I feel insecure.
Self sabotage has always been my thing, the moment I feel threatened in my security, I've always come running back, right in to your comfortable arms.
But deep down I realize my biggest fear is that I will fail.
Fail is something I have NEVER done.
I have fallen so many times, but I got right back up stronger than ever before.
So I've built these false illusions around what I really want and it has prevented me from having what I really want to have.
I've made a huge decision that I am just not okay with that any longer.
So, when I catch myself running back to your comfort, I'm going to remind myself that I am not in control. I never was.
I refuse to remain the same.
I've built a whole new identity and belief system because its time for me to really be the person I came here to be.
So I want to thank you for your wisdom. Without you, I wouldn't be sitting here breaking up with you.
I know I will meet you again. I know we will dance and fall back in love with one another, but I promise I will catch it much faster next time and leave stronger than ever before.
Fear, I am grateful for you. Thank you for teaching me my greatest lesson and that is you are not real.
I created you to keep me safe. But safe was an illusion I created as well.
I now see what I really want to create.
Without you life would have been much too easy. There would have been no lessons.
I wouldn't have found the way to make this easy. Fear, you are amazing, in so many ways. But, its time for me to go.
Thank you for all of your time, energy and teachings to my life.
I am eternally grateful for all you taught me.
With the deepest sincerity,